Monday, September 26, 2011

Counting Down

It's hard to believe, but we have less than one week before we leave Israel! We have a full week of packing, sorting, and giving away coming up, and we may also try and see one or two more sites we haven't gotten around to yet. Once we leave next weekend, we are flying to Salzburg, Austria to spend a week at a little lodge in the Alps thanks to a timeshare my parents gave us. We cannot WAIT for some time just to relax and process our time in Israel, not to mention the fact that it will actually be somewhat cold outside. (We're definitely feeling ready for fall!) We will then fly into New York, stay there for one night, and then head to a job interview for a really exciting potential position for Zach.

It is certainly going to be a crazy next few weeks, but we're excited about each step. We're continuing to pray that the Lord would show us exactly where He wants us to be for this next season of life. If you think of it, we'd appreciate your continued prayers for us, too -- for continued peace, wisdom, traveling mercies, etc.

We'll keep you posted!

Thursday, September 8, 2011

Before and After

We turned our room into a barber shop last night and I cut Zach's hair after several months of growing it out (definitely the longest I had ever seen it!) He also shaved off his beard (also extremely long), and the difference is pretty crazy.

Before: 


After:

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

Bittersweet (his and hers)

(From Kels)

Several weeks ago, I transcribed a sermon preached from 1 Kings 17 when Elijah was fed by ravens in the Kerith Ravine. Elijah prophesied that there would be a drought throughout the land of Israel, but God told him to go hide east of Jerusalem in the Kerith Ravine where he could drink from the brook and be fed bread and meat twice a day by ravens.

All is well for Elijah until verse 7: "Some time later the brook dried up because there had been no rain in the land." I can imagine Elijah's thought process here. Okay, Lord. I know I prophesied about the drought coming, but you brought me here to this place and have been providing for my daily needs. Now you're just going to let the brook dry up? Why is your provision stopping? Did I do something wrong?

In verse 9 we realize that no, Elijah didn't do anything wrong, and God's provision from the brook stopped for a reason. "Go at once to Zarephath in Sidon and stay there. I have commanded a widow in that place to supply you with food." Basically the Lord was telling him that his time in the Kerith Ravine was finished, and He would now supply for his needs in a new place: Zarephath. It might not have been Elijah's plan to leave the Kerith Ravine, but since it was clearly God's purpose, he was faithful and went to Zarephath.

Over the past several weeks, we have been been feeling a lot like Elijah in that the "brook" of living in Israel seems to be drying up. First of all, the lease on our apartment expired at the beginning of August, and we had been diligently looking for a new place to live for several weeks. After walking through 15-20 potential options, we kept hitting dead ends -- too expensive, not set up well for Charis, mold infestation, bad location, shady landlords, etc. We were certainly not being overly picky, but there was just nowhere that felt right. We also applied to be volunteers at five different Christian organizations in Jerusalem that would provide housing for us if we worked for them. Unfortunately, we were rejected from all of them for various reasons (we have a family, Zach is a student, etc.), and that was a bit disheartening. Thankfully, there is a family from our church who rents out rooms in their spacious apartment, so we have been living here for almost a month now. It was certainly the answer we were looking for because our lease expired, but it's not necessarily something suitable for the long term.

We also ran into a variety of issues with Zach's school, most notably with the financial aid office. Because of a silly miscommunication between us and the financial aid department, we missed the deadline for this coming semester and therefore can't receive any aid at all from the school. We received a generous package last semester (and were certainly counting on the same for the semesters to come), so that was extremely frustrating. It obviously doesn't feel right to pay thousands of extra dollars this semester simply because of a miscommunication, but financially we can't really afford to defer admission and wait around until the spring semester (when we can re-apply for financial aid).

Finally, money has been really tight since we got here, and after exploring every option we can think of to sustain ourselves financially, we still aren't making ends meet. We're obviously happy to live on a shoestring budget, but at this rate we're just not going to last for another year and a half.

All of these issues converged heavily on us on August 1st (which was, coincidentally, our 2nd wedding anniversary). We were stressed and overwhelmed to a greater degree than we had ever been in the past, and we felt like there was no peace to be found anywhere. Ultimately we just spent that evening praying and praying and praying for God to show us His will, and ultimately that we would receive the peace that passes all understanding.

After extensive prayer and discussion, we both came to the same somewhat confusing question: Is God calling us back home? We began talking through it and just started to realize how clearly the Lord was shutting every door for us being in Israel. Our plan has obviously been to be here for two years (and for Zach to finish the M.A. program), but that night we began to see the Lord working in a different way.

We let those feelings and thoughts simmer for a few days, continuing to talk and pray about whether or not coming home could really be God's will for us. We soon realized that when we thought about coming home and all that entailed, while it certainly wasn't what we had planned, we felt the peace we had been praying for so diligently. And that peace continues even now.

So after seeking further advice and counsel from family and friends, we've made the decision to come back to the U.S. We don't know where we'll be or what we'll be doing (though we are actively seeking to figure that out), but we will return to American soil on the tenth of October. It's certainly a bittersweet decision, yet ultimately we feel completely peaceful about it.

Okay, enough about us and back to the story of Elijah and the widow at Zarephath. The Lord has absolutely used that passage of Scripture to confirm in me what He's doing in our lives right now, and I stumbled upon another reference to that story in Luke. Jesus says:

"I assure you that there were many widows in Israel in Elijah's time, when the sky was shut for three and a half years and there was a severe famine throughout the land. Yet Elijah was not sent to any of them, but to a widow in Zarephath in the region of Sidon."

In other words, God could easily have continued to provide for Elijah in the land of Israel, but instead it was His plan and purpose to move him to Zarephath (which is actually modern-day Lebanon) so he could continue the Lord's work there. I feel completely the same way about our situation: the Lord could easily continue providing for us here if it was His will for us to be here for another year and a half, but we feel Him calling us to our new "Zarephath" – wherever that might be. We aren't just giving up because things have gotten too hard here; we're following the Lord down a path He's clearly carving out for us.

It probably goes without saying that we could certainly use your prayers over these coming weeks as we look for jobs and/or a graduate program Zach can transfer to. We know the Lord will show us in His timing, and we're excited about what He's going to provide. We'll keep you posted!

(From Zach)

I remember a day, probably a year and a half ago now, wandering around our neighborhood in Oregon praying. I was asking God to give me some guidance, to show me what the next step for Kels and I was and where to lead our soon-to-be growing family. The way we saw it, we had three options. We could stay at UVC, where we were teaching at the time, and I could continue to teach even after Charis came along. We loved our jobs there and loved the community, but we saw our position as unsustainable given the realities we were about to face. Our second option was to continue to pursue another job in Roseburg. I was being considered for a position elsewhere, one that wouldn’t have had a whole lot of downside – it was a great gig, something I would have loved, with a salary that would have ensured our relative comfort until we had at least nine or ten kids. It was a good deal, and I was honored to even have the potential opportunity. The last option was to move to Jerusalem where I would go back to school and work towards my M.A. in Religion. This was something Kels and I knew we wanted to do essentially from the time we started dating, and we thought that we might never have as much freedom to leave our lives behind and move overseas as we did at the time. If you’re reading this, you know what we chose.

But God’s call on my life has not always been obvious to me. As Kels does, I relate to Elijah (although not the same story), who was not able to experience the voice of God in any of the ways that would have been the most obvious, but had to wait for the gentle whisper. As I prayed that day in Roseburg, I did hear God answering my prayer. But he didn’t tell me to stay at UVC, or pursue this other job, or to go to Israel. What I kept hearing, over and over, was this: Don’t make your decision based on where you will be most comfortable. We didn’t, and He blessed us in incredible ways to ensure we would even be able to get here. Even through the difficulties that followed making such a big decision, Kels and I both felt an inner peace about what we were about to do.

It is this peace that I am learning to equate with the will of God and to pursue in my life. Given his promise to ensure a peace that surpasses understanding, it is a wonder to me that I haven’t always understood its importance. It is a peace we wouldn’t have had if we had made any other decision back in Oregon. And it is a peace we have now in deciding to trust His call on us to go back to the States. This is a crazy time for us, and to go into all the nuances of what went into our decision or all the things involved in discerning that call more specifically would take me more words than I’m willing write at the moment. But I will say that we feel a great peace.

For this to be the will of God is confusing to us. When He led us here in the first place, we were sure it was at least partially because I was supposed to get my M.A. in Jerusalem. Leaving ensures that won’t happen, and that is a bitter pill to swallow in a way. We also had a lot of people back in the States praying for us, rooting us on while we were here, and some that gave incredibly generously financially. This decision is hard for that reason too; I can’t escape the thought that someone will be disappointed in us for failing to persevere and see out our time here.

As I’ve prayed through this though, I’ve come to a realization. Call it a cop-out if you will, but I believe it to be the truth: God can do whatever he wants. If His will was for us to stay here in Israel for another sixteen months, I believe we would know it. I believe we would do it. He has chosen, for reasons beyond our limited mortal vision, to lead us home. I’ve been praying that we would know one day soon exactly why, but it’s possible we will never know. But we believe this is His will, and I won’t deign to argue with that.

All that aside, we’re really excited to get back. Among other things, we have really missed 1) our families and friends, 2) Chili's, 3) Chipotle, 4) Taco Bell, 5) Pizza Hut, 6) Root Beer and Mountain Dew, 7) reasonable prices, 8) playing sports, 9) our church, 10) rain, 11) snow, 12) nice people, 13) grocery store runs, and 14) driving.

There are quite a few things we will miss about Jerusalem as well, and perhaps that list will have to be included in a goodbye post. For now, though, we’re focusing on what’s to come. See you all soon.

Saturday, September 3, 2011

Two Day Trips

Since we have some free time right now, we've been doing some fun day trips around Jerusalem to make sure we see everything we can during our time here. A week or so ago we went to the Biblical Zoo, which is basically just a nice zoo in which many of the animals were mentioned somewhere in the Bible. Charis is still at a borderline age for really understanding going to the zoo, but she definitely loved pointing at the animals and watching them move around (especially the big ones).

One of Charis' personal favorites


Then two days ago we visited the Israel Museum, which is home to a variety of pretty fascinating exhibits. Here are some highlights:



This is a HUGE model of the Old City of Jerusalem during the 2nd Temple Period (the time of Jesus). You can see the Temple area prominently in the foreground of the picture.


The original Dead Sea Scrolls are housed underneath this building. You can't take pictures of the Sea Scrolls themselves, but it was pretty amazing to see them in person (especially the Isaiah scroll, which is a completely intact version of the book of Isaiah). The exhibit is shaped like that because that is the same shape as the lids of the jars in which the Sea Scrolls were found.

Adjacent to this white structure is also a large black wall, and the pair of these represent the "Sons of light and darkness." There is a famous apocryphal passage in the Dead Sea Scrolls that describes these sons, and the exhibit reflects it visually.

The actual museum contained thousands of relics and artifacts from Israel's entire history, and it was pretty incredible what had been unearthed. One of our favorite artifacts was an ankle bone with a nail driven through it. It belonged to a criminal named Johanan who lived during Jesus' time and was crucified on a cross like Jesus would have been. You could still see the blood soaked through the bone, and the nail was still prominently embedded. Pretty fascinating.

Charis got a little tired of the museum after a while, but she did enjoy playing outside while we took turns finishing up.


Tuesday, August 30, 2011

On becoming a homemaker...

If you knew me at all in high school (and maybe even college for that matter), I probably didn't strike you -- I didn't even strike myself -- like the classic stay-at-home-mom who loves to bake and clean and be surrounded by children running around. To be honest, I was usually so busy with academics, cross country, track, gospel choir, or some other activity that I didn't really have much time to think about what I was going to be like once my "mom" days came around.

But, as you now know, they came around quite quickly, and I have plunged headfirst into being a wife and a mom and a homemaker and everything else that entails. It has not always been an easy transition for me (especially those first couple of months with Charis when Zach was at work most of the day), but just over the past couple of weeks I have to admit that I really am beginning to feel, well, maternal.


I am starting to really enjoy making cookies from scratch, hanging laundry outside on the line, nursing my almost-14-month old (though I am feeling a bit ready for her to start sleeping through the night :)), and getting creative with our meals at home. Israel has stretched me tremendously in the cooking department since almost everything we make here has to be done from scratch, and while there have been some epic fails over the past several months (just ask my patient husband), there has been great growth, as well. I am starting to feel way more comfortable in my role as a homemaker and mother, and for that I am extremely grateful.

Yet as all moms do (I hope?), I still have my moments of selfishness and why-aren't-you-asleep-after-forty-minutes-of-nursing and is-it-seriously-already-time-for-me-to-make-another-meal? But, of course, in spite of my shortcomings I'm grateful to have a God and a husband who are always full of patience, forgiveness, and love. And when I relax in Zach's arms as we watch Charis giggle and crawl all over us after a long day, I know there can be nothing as sweet as this.


Monday, August 22, 2011

Four things I like on the internets

Now that I've discovered that we do actually have a tiny bit of testosterone perusing this page, I decided two posts in two days wasn't much of a stretch.

If you're reading this blog (or if you're not reading this blog, for that matter), there's a very good chance you couldn't care less what I like to read. If that's you, I encourage you to skip this post and continue checking back for pictures of my daughter -- you won't regret it. A few months ago, though, my uncle emailed me after I posted a link to an article I had glanced at recently and told me he would love to see more of what I was interested in reading. So this post is for you, Uncle Matt.

These articles are not necessarily about particularly deep or scholarly subjects and have nothing to do with each other subject-matter wise; they are united by the fact that I like them and think they are brilliantly written. I should also mention that, despite the fact that these are some of my favorites for various reasons, I by no means agree with everything in them. So, in no particular order:

1) The babycult: Having children in an age of affluence by Read and Rachel Schuchardt

I am perfectly willing to admit that I'm not entirely objective when it comes to this one. Read was one of my professors at Wheaton and he and Rachel became some of our closest mentors and friends by the time we left. They are also some of the most sincere believers we know. Kels and I read this article a few months after becoming parents and have never been the same. It was actually written when the Schuchardts had only three kids -- they now have eight. Just an incredibly transparent view of the society we are all influenced by.

2) Your Stupid Rage by Brian Phillips

The only sportswriting piece I'll include in this list, I promise. Brian Phillips isn't necessarily my favorite sportswriter out there, but I think he might be the very best writer I've come across who happens to write about sports. He writes for Grantland, Slate, and Run of Play, his own blog which this article happens to be from. The first time I read it I loved it so much I actually emailed the aforementioned Mr. Phillips. There aren't many pieces of writing that could inspire me to do that. Caveat: If you know nothing about international soccer this one might be confusing at times, but still worth a read in my view as it applies to other sports and to life in general. There is also some unflattering language used here so don't read if you're offended by that sort of thing, but it's a very positive article overall.

3) Shipping Out by David Foster Wallace

Caveats with this one: It's very, very long. Don't even start unless you have at least an hour to kill. Also, I kind of cheated considering this was not technically published on the internet initially but in Harper's Magazine but hey, this is my list. I also officially rate this one PG-13 for some strong language and adult themes.

Now, all that being said, I'm quickly learning that I'm not the world's best writer, but I would like to think I know good writing when I see it and every sentence David Foster Wallace writes leaves me wishing I had thought of it first. You can hear a hint of the fatalism evident of a tortured soul here -- Wallace struggled with depression for twenty years and committed suicide in 2008. You can also hear some of the moralistic undertones and big picture-mindedness you would expect from a believer, which Wallace apparently was as well. He was also hilarious, and I laughed out loud a few times while reading this one.

Convicted by the Holy Spirit: The Rhetoric of Fundamental Baptist Conversion by Susan Harding

Okay, so this one was also published in a journal rather than online. It's also the only entirely scholarly article listed here and I'm currently using it for a paper I'm writing in one of my classes. Harding does not write here from a Christian perspective, but she is remarkably attuned to the dynamics of the Baptist church and to the steps necessary for true conversion according to the pastor she speaks with. I think it's a fascinating read -- the way in which Harding seamlessly moves back and forth from researcher to subject to researcher again is evident and somewhat unique.

That's my list. If anyone reads any of them, let me know what you think.

Sunday, August 21, 2011

1 AM in Jerusalem.

And I'm not tired. Also not working on the paper I should be working on. I have been entrusting the care of this blog entirely to Kels lately, which is probably not a bad decision but does lead to things like 100% female followership, if I may coin that word (Okay, so we do have a couple followers who may or may not be female because I'm not actually sure who they are. But I'm pretty sure I don't know many males who would have subscribed to a blog called "Pretty in Pink").

I don't know, but either way, I'm on hiatus from my once a month long-form narrative writing style to merely pop in and say I have the most beautiful wife and daughter on earth. No competition.

That's all.